IS IT BY FORCE TO FOLLOW YOU?

by - 12:32:00



Greetings to you all, I hope your day is going on as planned? Today I would like us to discuss a really disturbing issue, or should I say an issue that’s really disturbing to me.

What do you think it is? Well, it has to do with Social media and the plenty wahala it brings.

To expatiate further, I would share a story that happened to me. 

So yesterday morning, while I was browsing on Instagram, I got a follow request (my page on Instagram is on private). Immediately I got the request, I checked out the person’s page. That’s what I mostly do, whenever I get a follow request, to decide whether to accept or not, I check out the person’s page. I do this so as to know what the person is about, whether I know the person and whether the person’s posts aligns with my belief, for example, I didn’t accept a person’s request when I discovered all sorts of porn on the page, naked pictures and all. Immediately I saw naked pictures all over, I knew that I couldn’t be associated with such a one, so I declined. I’m just giving an example.

Back to my story, after checking out the person’s page, I was like I don’t think I would accept, the thing is whenever someone follows me, I follow back immediately except on rare occasions. 

Anyway I liked a post on the person’s page, then suddenly I got a message from the guy (the person who sent the request is a guy) saying, “so you liked one of my pics, but you didn’t follow me neither did you accept my request” (paraphrased). I responded “lmao, I’m sorry, but I don’t know you naI even inserted a laughter emoji (I meant I didn’t accept the request because I don’t know you). I was even gonna accept the request because I thought the guy is funny, only for the guy to reply with “madam so you must know someone before you follow them, I saw your comment on instablog and I decided to follow, I didn’t know that I offended someone I can see that you dey use me wash” (paraphrased).

I was like wao, wawu, I hate drama, and neither do I want any form of negativity around me. How can someone misread me all of a sudden, and just assume? For someone to turn my simple answer upside down, then I don’t want him in my social media life, lol. I was really pissed I then replied, “Na wa oh, funny how you’ve taken this south. Anyway, you didn’t offend me.

He then responded with, “If I have offended you, tell me so I can apologize. I didn’t respond, he then deleted the comment. He then tagged me in another comment saying, “I think I offended you, I’m sorry ma”. I didn’t respond, and I didn’t respond because I wanted to ask him whether it was by force to accept or follow him, or why he would just judge me and say I’m wash. Funny thing is, all this whole conversation happened on his page.

That was yesterday, I thought the drama was over, only for me to discover this morning that he had tagged me in another comment saying, “Madam I tire for you oh, so person gatz beg you to follow you. I tire oh haaa Aunty Celebrity”.

I was like, wow. First off, is it by force to follow you or accept your request? Is social media friendship by force? It is someone’s prerogative to either accept or decline a request.

I’m a private person and I don’t believe my private life is for the viewing of others, on my page, I rarely post pictures of my family, that’s why on my blog I’m anonymous, so my Instagram page is on private. 

I was really angry with his comment, but still, I kept quiet, he wanted me to say something obviously to start a drama and me, I’m not interested in that, so I kept quiet. If I had replied him, I would ask him whether it is compulsory to accept his request. 

The world is getting increasingly very wicked and one has to be careful with social media.

I don’t know why the validation of social media is to some people a top priority.
It’s not that deep, if someone’s page is on private, please respect their privacy and move the hell on. If they accept your request fine, if they don’t, please keep it moving and don’t take it personally. Life is all about choices, and so is friendship.

The truth is Instagram has made us monitoring spirits; some people follow you because they want to monitor/know what’s going on in your life and seeing that private page makes them mad. 

That was how one day, I was on the page of a celebrity, and some of his followers were angry that his wife’s Instagram page is on private. Funny thing is, they were taking it very personally. The celeb jejely asked them whether it was by force for them to follow his wife, as they kept saying his wife was rejecting their request. He even had to tell them they were monitoring spirits, Lmao. But I love his reply, the fact that he’s a celeb, does not mean people have the access to his life or that of his wife.

Sometimes I don’t know whether Social media has done more good than harm or more harm than good. We live for the likes, the nice comments; the validation complete strangers give to us. This is bad and it must stop. 

I also noticed another funny trend; someone will follow you and then write please ff back. It begs a question, are you following the person because you want them to follow you? I think we should ask ourselves what the reason you follow someone is, is it to follow you back? Or is it because you find their page interesting or inspiring? What’s the REAL reason? Whenever I see that please follow back, it’s like you’re begging someone to “please approve me”. 

Someone may not follow back, because 1) they don’t know you 2) they don’t feel your page is interesting or would add value to them, please don’t beg anyone to follow you.

The funny thing is, people, send these things to celebrities; I find it puzzling that because you have access to a celeb’s social media page does not mean they have to prove anything to you. Celebs are human beings like us, they have feelings too and we should please let them be human. Someone sent a “please follow me back” to a celeb recently and the celeb replied, why? And the person was angry, imagine. 

What’s the essence of this article? Let’s stop seeking the approval of social media, friendship has never been by force. If someone turns you down on social media, it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you, neither does it decrease or measure your worth.

You are beautiful, you are handsome, you are intelligent, and you are amazing all by yourself. 

Selah.





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